My idol was Dt. Coke. My addiction had become so bad that I was drinking 5-6 a day (at least). My husband would find open cans in my car, kitchen, bedroom, office. I would have them stashed in the Church office and in my purse. I might have been on the verge of keeping a stocked mini-cooler in my van if God hadn't given me the idea to break free.
I went cold turkey - drank a ton of them on Mother's Day and then woke up Monday morning with a new resolve. I knew the caffeine and chemicals were bad for me. A doctor on TV one day - I am an avid fan of Dr. Oz and it was a guest of his - said "I tell my patients Soda is the Devil's Urine." Now grab that visual and still chug one down!
Day 1 - I survived by sheer willpower and determination not to be broken on my first day! Crying out, "God help me!".
Day 2 - I barely survived and only by praying out to God - "I am weak but you are strong, save me!"
Day 3 - I managed to walk around almost semi-human but only because I had to. I remember texting my brother "I feel like a crack addict, this withdrawal is unbelievable, what is going on?" I had a severe headache, I was lethargic, I was cranky beyond cranky, I even feel like I had the shakes and kept reaching for a can of dt. coke - just wanting to hear the pop of the tab, to listen to the fizz of the bubbles, to take that first glorious sip of straight chemical sugar! My brother's reply was so... uhm... empathetic, "you are an addict to dt. coke, this is an addiction, listen to your body telling you." Ugh! Couldn't delude myself any longer and make flippant "I am addicted to dt.coke" remarks anymore. Now it was real. Prayer to God - unceasing!
Day 4 - I woke up alive! And filled with Joy and energy and ready to conquer the world! I could see clearly now, no dt. coke fuzzy filter! ;-)
Today I am a year and about 18 days free from Dt. Coke. Bad habit broken. At first I replaced those physical cravings with seltzer water - but I really didn't need that for more than 2 weeks. It was true for me what some have said - after 21 days I didn't crave anymore and after 6 months I didn't even think about it anymore. Now I don't drink any soda at all, green tea (the real stuff, brewed myself with no sugar or sweeteners) is my drink of choice along with water. Isn't God so good? God gave us water and tea leaves and go figure that drinking just those I feel amazing. Even a cup of coffee every now and then reminds me that water is what I really want.
Living Water - Jesus is the Living Water in our life and in our souls and when we thirst isn't our thirst really for God? Breaking Bad with Dt. Coke gave me a new awareness and appreciation for the gift of water and made room in my life for the Spirit to move. (I will leave for another post the alarming number of people in our world who do not have access to clean drinking water!)
This Mother's Day I gave up Fast Food Restaurants - I will NOT eat at any restaurant that has a drive-thru (and this includes their counterparts housed in a mall or rest stop area.) I am 18 days free of Breaking Bad with Fast Food. Amazing - I wonder if my veins have yet recovered from the salt and grease, probably need 18 months to work all that out of my system! Drive Thru(s) had become my best friend in my crazy, living in my car some days schedule. My first clue I was addicted was my kids saying, "NO, not again" and refusing to eat any fast food. Let the little children teach us!
Breaking Bad with food addiction - could it be as simple (and complex) as allowing God to love us and loving God back? Could it be as simple as realizing we are sacred beings housed in this unglamorous, often traitorous flesh? The Holy Spirit is loving us and calling us, can we hear through the cacophony of physical cravings or denial of physical cravings? Let's face it people are addicted with food on the full spectrum from anorexia and bulimia to binging and compulsive over-eating. No matter where on the spectrum, it is obsessive thought with tangible food - when our thoughts should be focused on God.
Paul often uses the word "Beloved" when speaking to us. Be Loved. Be Love. I wonder if we allowed ourselves to Be Loved by God which enables us to Be Love in the world - who would have time for food addiction? Be"ing" Love is life altering and all consuming.
The question I ponder today is can we allow ourselves to Be Loved by our God? It isn't a question of whether or not God loves us - We Are Loved! The real question is can we accept that we are Loved, we are Love - can we wake up this morning, look into the mirror and say "Good Morning God! Good Morning Love! What shall we do together today?"
Beloved, Be Love today!
"For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you,
Do not fear; I will help you." Isaiah 41:13
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